Knowing there would be a full day off the next day, Monday we felt it was our duty to "train for Squaw Peak"*. Needless to say the training mostly consisted of 12 oz curls. Tuesday morning was going to hurt, little did I know how much!
After waking up too early, stupid biorhythms, Curt asked if I wanted to go hiking. Being an idiot, I agreed, so this time we actually headed out to Thunderbird park. It was as we left the parking lot that Curt mentioned that he felt like doing the bigger 5.8 mile loop. Jackass. I guess it was apropos that "Lunatic Fringe" by Red Rider** blaring from ipod nearly drowned out Curt. So we busted our humps up one hill and down then back up the other hill when I decided to run the final mile and a half. Mostly to impress the other people on the trail***. I'm pretty sure my ipod has it in for me as on the final little uphill of the trail as your legs are burning and lungs gasping for air, Shirley Manson of Garbage starts growling "this is not my idea of a good time" from my demon ipod. It truely is pure evil.
On a sidenote, don't you hate it when some horse's ass ruins your workout. Well it happened to me literally. Just as I crested the aforementioned final uphill, BAM! there was a pack of 3 morons on horses blocking the trail. Some people just have no consideration for others.
After feeling good about our workout we collected the Little Kid and Vocht and hit In 'n Out**** before heading to Turf Paradise for some horse racing.
As you can see, one of us... cough, cough, Curt... looks just like a track regular. Let the gambling commence!!
The big winner was Little Kid. God, I feel dirty just writing that! He hit 2 trifectas and also picked the winner in one of those races collecting about $250 in winnings. Obviously beers were on him.
Here he is pretending to be in the winners circle with his big money winning horse. Those two betting stubs netted him $190. Jerk!!
Having had no luck with some lame horses I decided to try and scare my horse into running faster by pretending to be a tiger. No such luck. Yes, I fully admit I'm a moron!
If you ever want to see a waste of money here you go...
Yes, that is our dead ticket pile. A lot of innocent soldiers died in this pile of betting casualties. As you can see there is a big ticket on the top courtesy of Kevin "gotta bet this one heavy" Vocht. I almost, and emphasize almost, feel bad for him because I was openly rooting for him to lose the 2nd race.
For the record 5 tickets were cashed in 8 races. Vocht actually cashed the first race then rolled it over to the 2nd and immediately lost it and tried playing catch up the rest of the day... bad idea. Dan cashed 3 times and walked away up a lot. Still a jerk. Uber-gambler Curt cashed a single ticket despite numerous times telling us he had each race figured out. In fact the only win he had was the late double when he picked the horses based on whether or not they had funny names to describe our night activities. Astute readers will note that leaves no wins for me, which is true, but I also bet the least. I guess I learned nothing that year working at Emerald Downs.
Can you spot the losers?
Luckily, no one gambled away the Suburban so after losing our shirts at the track we rolled over to Glendale for the Sharks/Coyotes game and more importantly my reunion with one Patrick Marleau. Gretzky must have lit into them the last couple days because it was a completely different Coyotes team than the one we saw look like a bad junior a team Saturday night. Or maybe he promised them all the green beer they could drink at the St. Patrick's Day***** party outside the stadium after the game (more on that later).
It was simply put one of the best games I've seen in a while. Don't believe me? Take a look at the boxscore. The Coyotes scored in the first and last 30 seconds of the game to win 4-3. Let's take a look at the awesome things that happened in between.
1) Patrick Marleau scored his 36th goal of the year to tie it at 3 in the 3rd period.
I am so jealous of Joe Thornton in this picture. Sure he has all the talent in the world and is a professional athlete. But look, he's getting a hug from Marleau. Oh to be that close!
2) There were 2 and a 1/2 fights!
The first of the night only counts as half because Rob Blake pulled Daniel Winnik's jersey completely off so the linesmen jumped in before any real punches were thrown (though they did get fighting majors). Jody Shelly and Brian McGrattan more than made up for it in the 2nd with a real heavyweight bout. This is why hockey is awesome.
3) Shane Doan played out of his mind and was named the number one star. He lit up the Sharks for a goal and 3 assists. Perhaps I should take credit as he probably feels jilted about being ditched from the blog.
As you can see, even Rob Blake tackling him couldn't stop him from scoring the game winner with 27 seconds left in the game.
There was only one negative from this game. Ed Jovanovski was initially credited with the Coyotes 2nd goal (assisted by Doan, naturally) only for it to be given to Kyle Turris during the intermission.
Does that not look like the picture of a guy celebrating a goal? I thought so.We didn't actually see any Coyotes players at the outdoor party. But we did see the nominees for Arizona parents of the year.
Yes, that really is Dad's beer in the cup holder of the stroller and Mom carrying kid in one hand and a Miller Lite in the other. You stay classy Arizona!
* No need to worry Brad, your time is safe.
** Can be found on the soundtrack of the greatest movie ever made about high school wrestling "Vision Quest"
*** Hey, you never know who you'll meet out there.
**** Yep, the diet of champions.
***** I'm trying to get people to accept it was named for Marleau not some dude from Ireland.
Photos from Turf Paradise courtesy of Vocht
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